Your Face
by YoolieYick
Summary: Two-shot. Bella reflects on when Edward leaves and Jacob reflects Bella's choice. Two different mini-stories in one. BxE, but doesn't really discuss it - Edward haters would like this too. R&R!
1. Part I: Bella

**A/N: This is a two-shot story using the song Your Face by Taylor Swift. I like this song a lot--and it definitely applies (I think) to both of the situations I applied it to.**

**I figured I should write and post BOTH of the parts before someone else would get this idea and try to steal by other part from me.**

**This takes place during New Moon. It's pretty obvious, but I pointed it out anyways.**

_Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Twlight series, nor do I own Your Face._

_I heard a song tonight on the radio  
Another girl sings about a boy  
She sees his face in every space, every room  
And I know that if I turn around you won't be there  
If I close my eyes, will you be there?_

The hardest part for Bella was to face the fact that he was not coming back. He didn't love her—not in the same way she thought he had. She wasn't good for him. Even though it was a simple fact she'd always known, the words seemed to sting coming from his perfect lips. Above all, he was the one that could hurt her worst.

He had done just that.

And she still loved him, despite it.

The everyday rain of Forks pounded against her window, poured in through the opening. Dimly, she realized that she should close it, shut it tight, lock it. But all she could remember was _his_ smiling face, sneaking in through that same opening, after Charlie went to sleep. All she could do was remember his gorgeous face, perfect voice.

It was late, and Bella knew it; she could tell by the spreading puddle of water on her floor. She'd been staring at the darkness outside her open window for what seemed like decades, waiting for someone that would never show up. He would never come through that window ever again.

Finally, when the water spread to touch her bare foot where it was resting on the wood floor, did she get up and make her way to the bathroom to find a towel. She cleaned up the water slowly, meticulously wiping every trace of the wetness of the ground. Then, she tossed the towel against a wall, crawling under her blankets, eyes staring at the shadowy ceiling.

Maybe, if she closed her eyes and slept, he would grace her with his presence in her dreams.

She didn't even care if she had nightmares. Not if she could see him again.

_I don't wanna lose your face  
And I don't wanna wake up one day  
And not remember what time erased  
I don't wanna turn around  
'Cause I'm not scared of what love gave me and took away  
And I don't wanna lose your face..._

Bella woke up that morning, brushed her hair, shrugged into some clothes, all the while, remembering the dreams she'd had that night. He was in them, as she'd hoped. He'd been there with her for only a few moments—but he was there to repeat what he'd said only a few weeks before—that he didn't want her.

It was times like these, right after she woke up, when she wished she had a talent for drawing. With his face fresh in her mind, she wished she could sit down, if only for a few minutes, and try to sketch what she wished to see.

Even a simple drawing would ease her worry of eventually forgetting his face. If she ever forgot one thing about him, she would never forgive herself, especially since that was one of the things he'd wanted. _Your memory is like a sieve. Time heals all wounds for your kind._

She would prove him wrong. Every minute of her life, every second of every day, she would remember his perfect face, even though it killed her to do so.

She never ever wanted to forget him.

Even if he never wanted her, would never come back to her.

He was still the best thing that happened in her life. To her, he was irreplaceable and unforgettable.

_I've got a picture of you in my bedroom  
And I hope it never falls  
I hope I never lose that feeling  
I used to get when you called  
And then I wonder to myself  
Who are you, where are you, were you ever here at all?_

She knew that she scared Charlie, even though Bella was trying her hardest to do just the opposite. She didn't want to cause anyone else pain; she didn't mean to if she did.

She remembered Charlie's horrified expression when he walked into her room to find every one of the CDs she owned snapped in half and in the wire trashcan by her bed. She remembered him watching her carry in her car stereo, ripped and mangled, utterly destroyed. Charlie was afraid for her—possibly even afraid of her.

But it was something she would never manage to explain to her father. What he meant to her was something only she would be able to comprehend. At one point, she'd thought _he_ could understand what she felt for him, but it was evident that those feelings were no more.

Sometimes, Bella sat and thought about him in the present—where he was, what he was doing. It seemed so illogical that he had even been in her life in the first place. It was hard to believe that he'd ever been with her; his whole being was so surreal.

But she hated to doubt her memories of his face, his voice, his family, afraid that she would start to believe them.

Start to believe that he's never been in Forks in the first place.

_I don't wanna lose your face  
And I don't wanna wake up one day  
And not remember what time erased  
I don't wanna turn around  
'Cause I'm not scared of what love gave me and took away  
And I don't wanna lose your face..._

The days passed slowly, but they still passed, even for Bella. Each morning, she reminded herself that he had been there, forced herself to remember what he'd said to her—every word from the beginning until the end. She thought of his face. His delicious crooked smile mocked her from the recesses of her mind.

But at least she still remembered, even though it made her bend over, clutching her chest in agony. She would give anything to see him again, hear his voice. She would endure pain fifty times this, so long as she could see him again, hear his voice again like she had in Port Angeles, with Jessica.

She never wanted to lose his face or his voice, no matter what the cost.

That was when she found the motorcycles.

_That girl in the song had it so good  
I wish I could close my eyes and see you  
I wish the sky had your face  
And the oceans had your eyes  
And the sunset had your lips  
And I had you..._

Bella's life was a little bit more complete with Jacob Black in it. She could not be mistaken—she still longed for _him_ more than she longed for even air to breathe. But Jacob was able to dull the pain, push it back far enough that she was able to withstand while she was around him.

When she had ridden the death trap of a motorcycle for the first time and heard his voice, she had been expectant, and her expectations were met when his liquid smooth velveteen voice spoke to her. She loved hearing him again—though she could not see his beautiful face, she would settle with hearing his voice in her mind.

It didn't even hurt right away, not like it hurt when she forced herself to remember.

His voice came to her effortlessly, smoothly filling the cracks and fractures he'd created in her life, for those few moments. Then, with Jacob there to help ease the pain of the after-effects, she could remain normal until she got home and was alone.

At home, though, _he_ was all she longed for. She could look around and see him everywhere. The twilight was his safest time, the rain and gloom allowed him to go outdoors, the ocean was something he could cross easily, without needing to breathe once.

Little things reminded her of him.

After the voices disappeared, the motorcycles became less appealing, and, more than anything, Bella wanted to be able to hear his voice again.

It was what she held onto, to keep his memory fresh.

_Oh, yeah  
I don't wanna lose your face  
And I don't wanna wake up one day  
And not remember what time erased  
And I don't wanna turn around  
'Cause I'm not scared of what love gave me and took away  
And I don't wanna lose your face  
Oh, no, no  
I don't wanna lose your face  
I don't wanna turn around  
Oh, oh, oh..._

She jumped off a cliff, was driven off the cliff, by her need to see him, remember him, hear him.

In a way, it brought Bella's life back—she was able to rescue Edward just in time, to find out that everything he'd said was a lie. He still loved her.

She jumped off a cliff, and was forced to choose later between two good things.

One who she would stay with, always remember, never forget.

The other who would be lost eventually, spiraling Bella into another round of pain, another bout of trying to remember every little thing.

She didn't want to lose his face—now that she had Edward, she needed to remember Jacob.

**Read and review PLEASE. Tell me what you think. I take anyyyyyy kind of criticism--you can even tell me you hate me and think this sucks. I don't think I would care.**


	2. Part II: Jacob

**A/N: This is the second part of my two-shot, using the other idea I had for this song.**

**This takes place after Eclipse, in the general area of Breaking Dawn.**

**And I do realize that the song talks about a girl in it. I also realize that Jacob is a guy. It still applies, even with the occasional gender issue.**

_Disclaimer: Once again, I really WISH Twilight was mine, but unfortunately, it is not. Neither is Your Face, by Taylor Swfit._

_I heard a song tonight on the radio  
Another girl sings about a boy  
She sees his face in every space, every room  
And I know that if I turn around you won't be there  
If I close my eyes, will you be there?  
_

Jacob scowled through the rain; eyes searching for what he knew wouldn't be there. His imagination was playing tricks on him again—thinking it could hear the familiar rumble of a familiar truck driving up that familiar road. As soon as the thought flashed through his mind, a ripple ran down his spine. His fists clenched.

She would never drive down that road again. She would never jump out of that old red truck and run up the drive, excited to see him. She was as good as dead.

_A long distance friendship_, his mind mocked cruelly. _As if that would ever work_. The wedding had come and gone—and Jacob had come home last minute to see her walk down the aisle, hiding in the shadows at the back of the church. No one had even noticed he was there.

In the end that leech had been right; Jacob had wanted the choice. Even if it killed him to see her stare up at that monster with love and pure, honest devotion. Even if she hadn't chosen him, hadn't chosen the choice that would keep her living. Even if she was willing to become a thing that he despised.

The least Jacob could give himself was that she was happy at least, wherever he had taken her. The least he had was the knowledge that she would be happy.

_I don't wanna lose your face  
And I don't wanna wake up one day  
And not remember what time erased  
I don't wanna turn around  
'Cause I'm not scared of what love gave me and took away  
And I don't wanna lose your face..._

Jacob's biggest fear was forgetting she existed. At night when he slept, her face was the thing he went to sleep seeing in his mind. Sometimes his dreams were sweet, remembering the times that they had sat in his garage, the times they had kissed.

Lately, ever since the wedding, those sweet dreams had morphed to nightmares. In his mind, her soft, angelic face twisted until her features were pale and sharp. He skin would be cold, her smell nauseating. No longer would she sound like the innocent human that she was—her voice would hypnotize instead. She would be like them, a replica.

He hated those dreams. He never wanted to lose her face from his mind, never wanted to forget how she was before. Before everything.

Sometimes he wondered if she remembered him the same way—sat awake at night, thinking of him. Sat awake at night when she could no longer sleep—because she wasn't able to—remembering her old friend.

_I've got a picture of you in my bedroom  
And I hope it never falls  
I hope I never lose that feeling  
I used to get when you called  
And then I wonder to myself  
Who are you, where are you, were you ever here at all?  
_

Jacob stumbled back to his literal bedroom, climbing atop his bed and sprawling out. That day had been particularly miserable. Leah hadn't left him alone for a minute, constantly bothering him about worrying his father, the pack, her brother. Her words echoed through his mind. _Maybe a funeral would be better closure than a wedding. Time to move on, boy._

But that was just the thing. He didn't want to move on. Why would he want to move on from something so special?

He lay diagonally across his mattress, reaching beneath his pillow to pull out one of the only pictures he had of her. The edges were worn and some of the photograph was smudged from his handling.

The picture had been taken that first day at the beach by one of his friends with a camera—most likely Embry or Quil. The two were sitting by the driftwood fire, blue flames lighting up their faces. She was smiling, looking down, while Jacob was laughing, staring at her.

He'd liked her even then.

Another flash of misery washed over him. He wondered what she was doing now, where the happy couple had gone on their honeymoon. He wondered if she was still the same, still the human Bella that he loved.

It would be hard to believe that she had even existed as something better when everything was said and done.

_  
I don't wanna lose your face  
And I don't wanna wake up one day  
And not remember what time erased  
I don't wanna turn around  
'Cause I'm not scared of what love gave me and took away  
And I don't wanna lose your face..._

That night, Jacob's dreams were the same as usual. He saw her laughing on the beach, watched her sit in his Rabbit and chatter aimlessly about anything and everything. He saw them walking down First Beach, hand in hand.

Then, _he_ came back in. That horrid bloodsucker had come back—or rather, Bella had made him come back. A flash of pain washed over Jacob, even in his sleep. She had wanted him back, after everything that he had done to her. After everything Jacob had done to make the pain go away, he wasn't good enough. He wasn't enough of a comparison.

The dream Jacob sat back and watched as the leech leaned in, kissed her as softly as he had at the wedding. The dream Jacob could do nothing as the monster's head reared back, coming down on her throat, biting...

His eyes watched the life drain from Bella's eyes.

_Time to move on, boy. Maybe a funeral would be better closure than a wedding._

A ragged howl broke through the air and suddenly, his dreams were filled with Leah. Or, more precisely, pushing Leah off a cliff. Those dreams were the kind he enjoyed, in his sick twisted way. By the time he woke up, his nightmare had receded to a place deeper in his head.

Slowly, he was making it through. Painfully, he was managing to live each day without her, with Leah as a thorn in his side. Jacob smiled wryly. Hell, if all of his dreams were to end in Leah's impending doom, he might have a reason to fall asleep at night.

But when he looked down at the crumpled photo in his fist, it all came flooding back. Even killing Leah wasn't worth all of that pain.

_  
That girl in the song had it so good  
I wish I could close my eyes and see you  
I wish the sky had your face  
And the oceans had your eyes  
__And the sunset had your lips  
__And I had you..._

Jacob ate the food Billy pushed at him as fast as usual, though his appetite was gone. He had no idea where she was, who she was, if she was even still alive. As fast as was possible, even for him, he was out on the beach, hands tearing at his shaggy hair, eyes wet. He didn't want anyone to witness his hurt, even though they all would know about it, eventually.

Everywhere he looked, he saw her. The ripped up tree where they used to sit, his garage, hidden behind trees, off in the distance. The cliff she'd leapt off, too unhappy to live with just him—always wanting someone else more.

The sun shone for once in a long while that day, shining down on him mockingly. _This is what you were for her, Jacob. Not even your sunlight was able to draw her away from the temptation of his darkness. You were eclipsed, pushed to the back._

Shudders ran up and down his spine. His control was so much better now, and yet, he could still get so upset over her. She was one of the only things that could make him lose his head, make him lose his tight control.

Leah was the only other. Her crude remarks, her ignorance, her self-centered attitude. That alone was enough to drive him near enough to the edge. But when she started talking about Bella...

The sun was already lowering in the sky, sinking toward the water. He had been out there, pacing along the beach, all day. His father was probably worried—but then again, Billy would know where he was, why he was there, just by using his fatherly sixth sense.

The sunset sank into the dim light of twilight, reminding him all over again of them, of her.

If only he could see her again, kiss her again. He wanted her, wanted to hold her, and wanted to tell her over and over that he loved her. He wanted her not to become a monster. He wanted her to be with him, not with Edward. He wanted her to love him more. He wanted her.

It would figure that the things he desired were things that could never happen.

_  
Oh, yeah  
I don't wanna lose your face  
And I don't wanna wake up one day  
And not remember what time erased  
And I don't wanna turn around  
'Cause I'm not scared of what love gave me and took away  
And I don't wanna lose your face  
__Oh, no, no  
I don't wanna lose your face  
I don't wanna turn around  
Oh, oh, oh..._

Even after all she'd put him through, after all the dreams and sleepless nights he'd had over her, he still never wanted to forget her.

He wanted to keep a vision of her etched into his mind for all of eternity, or as long as he decided to live.

He didn't want to wake up and not remember her, not matter how much time passed. He never wanted to lose her face.

**Read and review!**


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